so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
