yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
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I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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