you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
