Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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