I hate your face
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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