glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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