Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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