I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
