Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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