he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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