Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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