i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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