like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
