I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize