It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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