i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
