if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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