I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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