Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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