Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I CAN MOONWALK!
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
