trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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