We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I will be naked everywhere
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
