He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
pray to the hookup gods
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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