I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i just had sex bonerless
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize