i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
