singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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