Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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