Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
