Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
