then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
