I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
