I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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