Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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