if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
