you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
