I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize