Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
