these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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