So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
