i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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