I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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