im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I think your dad took our porno
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
