as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
