My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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