I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize