Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
