ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
