oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
