Dude my mom stole all your condoms
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
