Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize