i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
